I am a Mommy

I'll be honest. For years, this has been the most dreaded day. Not that I don't appreciate mothers and especially my mom and mother-in-law, but it's been extremely hard to "suffer in silence" and celebrate at the same time. You know - Church services where they ask all the moms to stand up. Brunches where each mom gets a flower. I mean, YES, they all deserve SO MUCH -- but I would have done anything to be one of them, too. 

This year is different. 

Not that I don't still feel the eerie void, because I absolutely do. 

But let me tell you - the love, recognition, and support I received today were like no other: cards, gifts, texts, calls, messages - a countless amount of love.

AND my hubby basically did everything around the house, the furkids were semi-behaved, we went shopping for NEW CARPET, and I even got in a nap! Perfect Day!

Last weekend, we surprised Grandma Dawn with an early Mother's Day Celebration

And today, Matt and I went out to brunch with my family and his family together. It was lovely.

Our beautiful Mothers

Cards:

From the furkids:

An amazing note from Matt:

And a homemade card from my mother-in-law: 

THOSE PUPS ARE SPOT ON WITH THE RIGHT COLOR COLLARS AND EVERYTHING!

Gifts:

A shirt that says: Don't judge my pit bulls and I won't judge your kids

SO FUNNY AND PERFECT!

 A necklace from my MIL with the boys' birthstone.

They also donated dog food to a rescue in my name!

 

AND A SELFIE STICK!!!!!!!

(more on that later...)

This morning, I read an infertility blog post titled: To Moms with an Empty Nest on Mother's Day

The minute I woke up this morning - I was kissed, cuddled, and loved.

There isn't a possible way I could consider my life an "empty nest"

I am a God-Mother

I am a care provider

I am a Mommy

• I've pulled all nighters 
• I've done bath duty
• We have a bedtime routine
• I've been thrown up on
• I worry
• I've been peed on
• I feed them everyday
• And take them to the doctor when they're sick
• We're trying to tackle potty training
• I post way too many pictures of them on Instagram
• I brag about them often
• I'm responsible for teaching them all their manners
• But I'm also guilty of over spoiling
• I've dressed them up for Halloween
• And placed their presents under the tree on Christmas Eve
• I'm going WAY overboard on planning first birthday party
• I've loved them since the second I placed my eyes on them
• But I also get very overwhelmed and stressed
• At times, I've wondered how I could ever love anything more
• And at times, I've thought we were way in over our heads
• But I wouldn't change a single thing
• I am loved
• I am needed

I am a Mommy.

Artwork and gift from:

Jude and Lily Lamano

Updates: Beauty and Pappy

First World Problems: My husband won't allow me to purchase new carpet. He says that I have to wait (CAN YOU BELIEVE IT) until at least October.

I walked in to work this morning feeling sorry for myself: It's Friday and I'm stuck indoors, I wish we were on our boat, I want new carpet, I want a new wardrobe, etc. etc. etc. 

And within minutes my entire perspective changed. Beauty does that to me. She makes me so grateful for what I have. And also, so thankful for the little amount that we're able to give her. I stare at her in amazement. Just from looking at her pictures, you can tell she is so full of spirit.

I logged into gmail and saw her bright, smiling face. She looks so happy. She is an orphan, who never knew her parents and who lives in an orphanage. Who has nothing more than maybe three articles of clothing and a pair of ratty old shoes. But she is happy.

1.4 million children in Ghana aren't even able to attend school. And here Beauty is, learning how to write. The pure joy I get from knowing that we're helping this sweet, little angel is like no other. Humbling, to say the least.

I think about her often, and Gosh, I wish so badly I had the chance to meet her. Sometimes I daydream of Matt and I adopting her. Then reality sets in. The expenses of adopting. And not only that - bringing home a six year old. From Ghana. I don't even know of an international adoption program that works with Ghana. Heck, I don't even know if Ghana allows international adoptions. But this never stops my heart from dreaming...

She truly is a Beauty. And I love her with all my heart.

And since we're on the topic of beauties...

I'll bring you up to speed on our other [delicate flower] beauty - Pappy

From the VERY beginning -

Easter Sunday - April 5th - People were about fifteen minutes away from arriving at our house for dinner when Pappy has explosive diarrhea all over our family room. Matt quickly takes him outside, then shampoos the carpet, then takes him on a walk to finish his "business."

We see Dr. Gerbig a few days later because his symptoms and loose stool didn't stop - and she prescribes him on antibiotic to help with his stomach issues.

I go to North Carolina to visit the Lamanos and Pappy is still sick at home with Matt. His meds were making him throw up, but after a few days he had adjusted and his stool got better (only while on meds).

About a week after that - we decide to stop his antibiotics to see how he does. Very loose stool again.  We put him back on his antibiotics and add in a prescription dog food (EN) because we think its a food sensitivity. Symptoms disappear and we're good to go.

Two days later - Pappy starts itching his old mange spots and his ears REALLY badly. Dr Gerbig finds one dead mite on his skin, so we start up his mange meds again.

Pappy stops itching his mange spots, but still continues to itch his ear a lot. I talk to Dr. Gerbig on the phone, and she prescribes him ear drops to help alleviate any infection he might have gotten from itching so much.

Two days later, we're back at the vet (this time for his yearly heartworm test) and the vet looks at Pappy's ears to confirm an infection. Wrong. Pappy had two ruptured eardrums. We stop the ear drops and go to a stronger dose of ear gel.

And now, we're to present day. Pappy is still itching his ears. He is still on prescription dog food for his tummy, and now, we think he has possible crystals in his urine.  For the past couple of weeks, he has been walking around the house leaving little trails of pee everywhere he goes. Matt and I think he doesn't even notice he's doing it. He also pees in his crate almost every time he's in there. Then! One night - he peed (not over-exaggerating) every 3 minutes or so. Little drops. All over the house (Hence, why I want new carpet).

We have an appointment at 1pm today to discuss his food sensitivity, recheck mange, recheck ears, and check his urine. We'll likely need to re-medicate his mange and his ears - and do something (I don't know what) for his crystals, or whatever they are. So, in the past month - we have been to the vet or tried a new medication at least once a week.

And it's gotten to the point where the vet bills aren't even the biggest issue anymore. My poor baby doesn't even know what it feels like to be just healthy.

When he was super young, it was a urine infection, then mange, then constantly throwing up, then diarrhea, then a food sensitivity, then ruptured ear drums, and now crystals??

I have Dr. Gerbig's personal email address and we communicate regularly. We are hoping in a couple of weeks, we can wean him off his prescription dog food and back to his normal Taste of the Wild. And throughout all of this stress, we've had the boys' dog-sitter, Sharon (who is 100x more than just a dog-sitter - More like a Grandma!), who has been absolutely wonderful. We are so thankful for her and the love she has given Pappy, Wally, Ernie, Lulu, and US!

My heart breaks for Pappy, and I'm praying that he will eventually get to 100% and just be the happy, loving puppy that he is.

Prayers are welcome. As always, I will keep you updated.

THE RETURN OF GILLIGAN

OUR BOAT IS ON THE WATER

Wooohooooo

CHEERS TO (almost) SUMMERTIME!!!